Stepping Off the Scale

“I’m happy with the way I look,” I told myself, staring into the mirror.

Yet, when I looked down to see what the scale read, that thought quickly disappeared. Rather than letting my confidence take control, I would let the numbers win. As such, I evaluated my self-worth by my weight—not the wisest decision.

This habit went on for a few months, perhaps even a year. Thankfully, though, I broke away from the scale’s power by deciding not to weigh myself anymore.

Since making that change, I’ve not only become healthier—I’ve become happier.

The scale does not know you. It cannot know the wonderful human being stepping on it. So, why do we let it determine if we are skinny/pretty/healthy enough?

Numbers are only numbers. Yes, it’s important to be aware of your body. However, constantly worrying about the numbers on the scale can cause us to become obsessed with our bodies. See the difference?

To avoid that scenario, we can use alternate methods to monitor our bodies without the negative effects of the scale. For example, try monitoring how your clothes feel on you: are they tighter, or are they looser? In fact, you could even just focus on how you feel: have you been happier lately?

Of course, I am not a doctor. But, speaking from experience, I think we all could benefit from a little self-love.

Who cares what the scale says? Don’t let the numbers decide your worth. Whether you’re underweight, overweight or right on target, you are a human being. You have dignity and you are valuable. You can accomplish any of your goals or dreams. You deserve a life full of happiness and peace.

So, treat your body as gift: be thankful for each limb you have and each movement you make.

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Sincerely,

Ash

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My Older Brother

Thanks to television and movies, I have always secretly wanted an older brother. Now, do not get me wrong, I love my family and would not change a thing about. But, I consistently thought it would be neat to have that one person who would help me with that tricky math problem, who would be my date to a school dance or who would stand up for me after a boy broke my heart—you know, just the seemingly classic older brother.

However, as the years continued to pass and I continued to grow, I have come to realize that I have had an older brother my entire life.

His name is Jesus.

While He cannot physically look over my shoulder, typing numbers into a calculator to help me with my math homework, physically dance around the room with me or physically dry my tears, He can, and certainly does, fulfill an older brother’s greatest task: loving me.

Perhaps in the past I longed for that absent sibling because my relationship with Jesus was simple and based upon what my teachers told me in school. But now, through my own college studies, personal prayer and readings, I have a better understanding, albeit imperfect, knowledge of Him. Specifically, I know that Jesus is always by my side, rooting for me and leading me to righteousness even when I sin. Also, I realize that simply talking to Him as if He was physically in the room actually causes Him to be present. Stated otherwise, just like Jesus presents Himself in the Eucharist after the priest blesses it, when we talk to Jesus, He enters our world, our homes and our lives to establish an everlasting relationship. Furthermore, Jesus fills any role we long for in our lives, meaning that whenever we feel alone or incomplete, Jesus satisfies us.

Of course, this relationship must not be solely focused on us and our needs. In particular, just as much as we yearn for divine love, Jesus desires our earthly love. So, while we use prayer to invoke His presence, we also ought to use that same vehicle to praise and adore Him. If we fail to do so, Jesus’ love will not cease, but we will develop an ill relationship. In fact, just like an actual biological relationship with an older brother, each sibling must take time to show appreciation for each other. Otherwise, both of them may not truly understand the dynamics of their bond, resulting in less interaction and weaker respect for one another.

Thus, whenever I struggle with homework, feel alone or let the world get me down, I know that I have an older brother constantly watching out for me and consoling me.

So, yes, I still long for an older brother, but not simply the kind from television and movies. Rather, I long for my older brother and His hugs. But, I know that longing will be satisfied fully when He comes again in His glory to be with me, and all of us, forever.

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Sincerely,

Ash

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A Season of Celebrating

A little over two months ago, we were celebrating the birth of our Lord at Christmas with joy, laughter, food and festivities.

But, now we are in the season of Lent.

Usually, we respect this time of the year by fasting and giving up something in honor of Jesus’ 40 days and 40 nights in the desert. So, some may try to give up chocolate, while others may refrain from using a social media platform. Either way, while these practices strive to teach us self-control, these restrictions we place on ourselves seemingly cause us to equate the season of Lent to a season of suffering.

In other words, giving something up can make us miserable because it’s simply a hard task to do. Likewise, if we are unsuccessful with our goals, we may become disheartened and disappointed with ourselves.

However, Lent doesn’t have to be this way and, in fact, it’s not supposed to be this way.

Rather than be likened to a time of suffering, Lent, like Christmas, can be a time of celebration.

In particular, these 40 days and 40 nights are meant to be a time of reflection and growth. We are called to examine ourselves and our behaviors, correcting our wrongs through God’s grace. We are called to search for Jesus in the desert and to consequently grow closer to Him so that after Lent, we may praise our Lord, singing, “Hosanna in the highest!”

Perhaps this idea can best be summarized by relating it to the homily I heard on Ash Wednesday.

In what was supposed to be a short address, the priest entertained us for about ten minutes, offering a Lenten practice for us all to undertake. Rather than giving something up, he proposed that we add something to our lives this season: gratitude.

For instance, we may say “thank you” a million times a day, but do we really mean it? Conversely, we may be so busy that those words never escape our mouths. So, beginning during these 40 days and 40 nights, the priest encouraged us to see God in our lives and thank Him for His gifts.

Thus, each morning we wake up, tell God “thank you” for another day of life. Furthermore, when we eat a meal, thank Him for the food.

Of course, this gratitude ought to extend to our brothers and sisters as well. So, if someone gives us a card, say “thanks” and display the card so that whenever we look at it, we think of that person. Or, if someone simply holds the door open for us, express gratitude and aim to reciprocate that act for someone else.

Overall, the point is that thankfulness spreads positivity and generates happiness, creating unity among us and with God.

Simply put, the point of Lent is to establish reconciliation. In other words, this time allows us to restore our relationships with each other and to refocus our lives on Christ while preparing for His death and glorious Resurrection.

So, don’t let this season be one of suffering. Instead, make it a season of celebrating life, love and God.

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Sincerely,

Ash

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Confidence and Character

 

After hours of studying, you get your test back marked with a 93% in red pen. This grade is the best you’ve gotten so far in the class and you are filled from head to toe with happiness. You turn to your friend sitting next to you to share your good news, but instead see the red pen on their test that reads 100%. Immediately, you feel jealous because your friend did better than you. Instead of being proud of yourself, your 93% has no value and makes you mad.

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This scenario, whether or not you have ever personally experienced it, is all too real. Every day, each and every one of us is consumed by jealousy: maybe someone got a better grade than us, maybe they lost more weight than us, maybe they got a present we really wanted, maybe they won a prize we thought we earned. The problem is, when afflicted by jealousy, we forget and disregard our own victories.

Theodore Roosevelt alerted us to this predicament when he said “Comparison is the thief of joy.”

Naturally, we strive for perfection and aim to do our best. However, society places us constantly in a competition: media platforms such as People and Time rank celebrities and others as “Sexiest Man of the Year” and “Person of the Year,” highlighting people as the best of the best; schools use Dean’s Lists to advertise the highest ranking students; even health insurances offer benefits to their customers who are the healthiest. These few examples demonstrate how it is simply just impossible to avoid comparing ourselves to others.

Although our world tries to tell us our grades, our looks and our weight decide our value, they don’t.

What does decide our value is our personalities.

Do we put all our effort into studying? Do we appreciate our appearances? Do we take care of our bodies?

We combat jealousy by building confidence and character. It is important to be proud of who we are because there is no one else like us in the world. No one can take our place and no one can fulfill our purposes on earth besides us.

We must approach our daily tasks and duties with this mindset and act accordingly by doing the best we can. However, we also learn from those who excel. Referring back to the opening example, if you got a 93% on your test, you could go over the questions you missed with your friend who earned 100% and learn where you went wrong. If we take the time to appreciate our efforts and the efforts of others, we can perhaps excel next time too.

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Life is not a competition.

We must all work together in harmony, looking out for each other and making sure no one is falling behind, so that together we can shoot for the stars and land on the moon.

Do not let comparison be the thief of your joy. Instead, let comparison direct you to greatness.

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Sincerely,

Ash

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